Monday May 31, 2010

The Cooking Channel could be bolder,
And have a series of world cuisine
That’s as cool as Flay or colder.
Instead they stick some sob
With potato salad
Or corn on the cob
With a menu that will
Be so boring to kill
Or at least send you
To the hospital.

Limerick Friday #5

He’s a party artist on the West Coast
His drum is loud and beats the most
When it’s rainy or nice
He’ll party for a price
But for us it’s free as we chant and toast.

Thursday May 27, 2010

My heart races at mach six for you.
A boom box that would make Janet Jackson
Break dance.
Each glance
Pops fifty more cents into the juke box.
We dance in business socks.
When I kiss you:
Pop rocks.

I’ll call a conference
And smoke you like a cigarette
Back stage
To censure the news.

But there’s always a leak
B/C
I’m a see-through screen
I spill head over heels for you,
A tsunami in your wake,
I follow my heart, and do a dance:
Can’t be faked.

Wednesday May 26, 2010

When Venus crashes into the meadowlands it will
Make us all into Alaotra Grebes, drowning in oil spill
Black instead of fading away from bird-eating fish and gill
Nets from humans without a sense of responsibility for an old brand.
But while we’re here, we might as well live and feed and be grand
And twirl our wings in open air over India or France or New York sand
Castles built in memorial out of small crystals that shine on the night skyline.
Even when apocalyptic clouds cover the shiny planets, the outline
Of our mark will last past the age of the sun and God will call it fine
Instead of good. We all make do with what is done; we get around
Anything in our way with acceptance in a sec, unless we listen to the hounds
Of conscience that tell us to be better, that greatness is built, not merely found.

Tuesday May 25, 2010

You’ll click on Detroit with your Walmart iphone
But still won’t find friends who you’ve tied yourself to
With a slipknot they’ve slipped through and you’ve lost.

I’ve never had 360 vision - let alone
Twenty-twenty, but I believe you, too,
Even with technology can make missteps like Faust.

Sometimes we’re stuck in a maze like pac man, alone
Against the odds, chances going south like you always knew
Even the bright colors of friendship bracelets can be tossed.

So you make some curry with a recipe on loan,
Have a potluck and invite a couple strangers, or more than a few,
And hope new conversation will break the frost and cover the cost.

Monday May 24, 2010

Some might say I’m lost
But I’m just debating destinations -
Mexico vs. England - which will host
My entertainment commerce.

I’m a lone hand
I need a loan,
I need a Lohan.

My chicks always malfunction
I need an explanation
Or finally
An alternate ending.

Birthday Limerick #2

He might spend all day with pacman
Trying to make synthetic life into human
But now is his birthday
And it’ll be a great day.
So welcome to the future, man.

Thursday May 20, 2010

We transform like fish from fry,
From froyo breakfast to coffee,
Our tastes change and we try
Varieties of all we can see.

Yet traditions latch on and retain the best
Like a bracelet and dinner
Doesn’t come from south or west,
It comes from Arkansas.

Or it sits on a tray for TV
And we eat like our parents sat
Waiting for Atkins or other celebrity
Diets to help us get fat.

Election Results Poem

Do you ever feel like the commission
Is selling you short - like our elections
Are full of spectres?
Well, hallelujah! I’m outta here.
From here on out
My primary concern will be to noodle
For lunch everyday without piercing the prey.

Tuesday May 18, 2010

Please pardon this post for its depression,
Sometimes we need a how-to guide
To return from our limits.

I have missed simple things
While being chased by dogs,
Battled by Vikings and pirates.

But these adventures pale in comparison.
I feel something missing, like a mountain not whole,
I’m somehow incomplete in my soul.

Monday May 17, 2010

He’s been an apprentice to celebrities
He sits courtside at the Lakers
And hopes Kobe’ll brush by his knees.

He wants to be hip as the incumbent,
Who’s tab is always open
And who’s bait always gets bit.

But whenever he sips he spills,
He can’t hold the cup
He’s over the hill.

He suped up his minivan with a wagon wheel,
Pulled up to miss america, said:
How do you feel?

His pride’s never injured
He’ll do alright
He knows he’ll be preferred one night.

Limerick Friday #4

He watched the sun beat down on the lake,
Asking: Dude, what should we make?
A field of dreams
Or so it seems
You can’t replace wildflowers with a bank.

Thursday May 13, 2010

Ascend with me above cares of money
Commercial interests warrant a boycott.
We are too alone, divided with our own lot,
A contentious diaspora is all we see.

Not that I’m a secret socialist
Bent on security, Or a modern Robin Hood
I’m just saying if I could
I wouldn’t keep a coupon list.

If we focus on strong intangibles
And become students of each other
We can live like sisters and brothers
And resume a dream otherwise unfathomable.

A Rap for Wednesday

If I’m a plain dealer
Why is my hood up
It ain’t ‘cause I’m ugly like Keillor
I protect myself like a pre-nup.

They can book your face with one look
They put you flat on your belly like a crook
While the cars I would steal like a tornado
They say I say tom-ah-to; I never even said tomato.
But that’s me not lookin’ at the macro
While they see the nexus
As my new white Lexus.

Tuesday May 11, 2010

Let us recall
The importance
Of the red wheelbarrow

It’s exclusivity at the top
Of our priorities
Is a fraud

Iced coffee
Matters, too, though
Change always causes scandal.

We’ll be bidin’ our time
Until the objects
In our lives

Work themselves out.
Or take a page
From the Amish.

Monday May 10, 2010

Ten big players
Had ten blue dollars
They wanted to buy one hundred fans
But they ended with zero followers.

They had trouble with their shoulders
And trouble with their drugs
They had trouble with their teammates
So they huddled and they hugged.

Why would a fan pay to see
His team court notoriety?

Birthday Limerick #1

It’s a super day today, birthday of my dad
We celebrate him grown up from a lad
His brother surprised him
David not Jim
The report is that this party’s not bad.

Seis de Mayo, 2010

Sometimes today feels like Friday,
The day of limericks,
But there are rules here, which have a say
In what’s written and what sticks.

We learn the importance of rules
From Milton Bradley games in childhood.
If people don’t follow, they look like fools,
But some would rebel if they could.

Maybe I’ll stand forty stories in the sea
And draw inspiration from ambient energy.

Cinco de Mayo, 2010

I have searched for you many times.
I rebuild you in different images
Taken from memories independent of experience.
But there is no recipe for perfection.

I will continually refine
Until we sync.

If we obey our arsenal of memories
And stand together with unflagging resolve
Our souls will tune
To the music of the spheres.

Tuesday May 4, 2010

To dream to be an
Opryland
Allstar

To rock the grandstand
Like Bret Michaels;
Blow minds

Eventually become nominated
For a Tony;
Be buried in Flowers


On stage. Eventually flooding
The market with
With mixtapes.

This is ultimate genre-bending.
Until one day, in the unpredictable May weather,
You become one of the Tennessee
Unemployed.

Your career, like a famous ovine,
Ages rapidly
And all that lasts from your starlight
Are audiobook soundbites.

Monday, May 3, 2010

I said no mayo, please.
Don’t you recall,
Cholesterol
Will dig me a red grave.

Can we be united --
Iron-clad
And madly fighting against eating badly?

Remember the time when diet’s were square,
Gut-bomb’s were the thing and the most popular name
Was Junior?

There is too much bad news today.
It makes me cross.
You never get my order right
No sense to make a flood of that sauce.

Only Oprah can save us.
Under your seat
Is a bucket of hummus.