Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Last time I saw you
I showed some reserve
This game isn’t a speedway
And my goal is around the curve.

You are my top choice
It is no accident
I see the trees and the woods
But my priorities aren’t bent.

I’ll kill a spider for you
And listen about children
But when it comes down to it
I’ll need some protection.

I’ll always be your attendant
And I’ll give back 100 times
All that from you to me was lent.

Monday, August 9, 2010

When I was hawking with my Welch buddies
We caught 11 rodents on this social outing
I sensed it wasn’t enough
Because my best bud, Jim, was pouting.

We climbed into the van
And roved over country land.
When we hit the river, Jim became the killer
Sending some fish to the fire
And some to the orthocenter.

Now with all our joint forces
We have fish, rodents and horses,
And our dinner is a bountiful metamorphosis.

Limerick Friday #9

Wyclef wanted a wheat-flavored M&M
He put out an ad to get ‘em
He heard he could score
At The Shore
And now he’s more than a little bit fem.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

This is the season of dog days
On a hot planet where sunbathers lay.

A child goes down a slide, shouting aptly,
Whoooooppppeeeeeee!”

Other kids play army rangers,
Not fully aware of real world dangers.

Tweens check out the wave pool,
Then turn to text b/c they’re too cool.

Girls in bandanas stroll through the wheat
Country singers note that stroll is so sweet.

A couple shares a pint of Unilever,
And life guards are busier than a beaver.

The water is cool and the skies are clear.
This is the best time of the year.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

This is a dialogue between you and me
I’m a mariner and this is my bottle in the sea.
Maybe your dog will find it on the beach
And after years of wandering I’ll reach you
And I’ll know my ability for speech is not a loss.
Eventually you’ll be my housewife, we’ll lie in the moss
Like ancient triceratops eating bread with olive sauce.
Apparently our house will be on the ground,
No walls, just a mound, and we’ll live on the lee.
That is, if you accept this proposition from me.
In the meantime, I’ll keep writing with a fishbone
Bobbing on the ocean with a bottle, but still alone.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

All I wanted to seal was the deal
Because it was a steal.
But I couldn’t swallow it
So I’ll wallow in it.
Maybe I’ll awkwardly retire
By torching this place
Like a tire fire burning higher
Making haste to lay waste.

Are we still together or did we break up?
My blackberry still contains our pre-nup.

If you’re a bachelorette, and you sign me,
I’ll be your Viking
Forever carrying you out to sea.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Where are you from when you’ve lived a lot of places,
Seen a lot of airports and passed a lot of faces?

The news from Iraq comes back on all the stations,
You can watch it with friends, cousins and all other relations.

You can trek on high desert plains
Or you can wade in the flood when it rains;
Chew on sugar canes and slam back Hurricanes.

Just don’t call the monkey a gorilla,
And if you’re hungry, eat enough to fill ya.

There’s no formula for getting through it,
And if, once you review it, you think you blew it,
There’ll be another chance to renew it.