Monday, August 2, 2010

Where are you from when you’ve lived a lot of places,
Seen a lot of airports and passed a lot of faces?

The news from Iraq comes back on all the stations,
You can watch it with friends, cousins and all other relations.

You can trek on high desert plains
Or you can wade in the flood when it rains;
Chew on sugar canes and slam back Hurricanes.

Just don’t call the monkey a gorilla,
And if you’re hungry, eat enough to fill ya.

There’s no formula for getting through it,
And if, once you review it, you think you blew it,
There’ll be another chance to renew it.

Limerick Friday #8

So you think you can dance?
Grind on Snooki and shake your pants?
With some luck
You’ll look like a schmuck
And if you spill a shot you’ll get another chance.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Real estate in a college town
Is a frenzy, but what a place we found!
Wait until you see the view
From my place in a city all new.

There’s a rainbow over my new abode
And there’s a window in the commode.
On the top floor, it’s a great place to dance
While we eat cheesecake and crank up the trance.

We’ll be closer to New York and The Shore
We’ll schedule two adventures or more.
A move could be a test
But this will be the best.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

A pitcher of poison beer
Is all I need to disturb my clear
Vision, spill my cup and make me crash
Blazingly, face-first into the trash
That’s full of rice. Nothing’s fair
And nothing’s nice, but if you care
About chivalry, you’re probably sexist
Or old fashioned like fighting leftists
In the Cold War. All I want is a Blue Boar
Not a bullfight or a downed flight.
I’ll drink anything that’s not Lite.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Let me craft a secret demonstration
On how to get a girl for you.
As long as this content is not leaked,
No one will have to listen to us argue.

Like the Harley she adores
You want to make it fast;
Make your wooing seem magic
It’ll be gone in a poof, or it will last.

Sometimes it takes high alcohol content
And some hip, stonewashed jeans.
Maybe a California crew cut
If it’s to that style she leans.

But if she holds you in contempt
Tell her she’s a star
And pray that karma
Will get you very far.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Hey, man, don’t worry about stress,
Let’s go to the Hawaiian islands
And care about less.

We have the power to surf,
Forget school,
And make a mess.

Still here you are,
Prosecuting criminals like Elliot Ness.

Don’t you know they’ll jailbreak
And fly the nest?
You can’t institutionalize those without a crest.

Just give them the test
And they’ll find the crest of the wave
On their craft like a slave to recreation.

You can’t settle down,
We’re an explorer nation.

Limerick Friday #7

There once was a man in a kitchen
He cut onions like a Frenchman
His tears caused a flood
Now he’s covered in mud
But his dorm food is really bitchin’.